I am not sure how to put the last seven and a half years into words. Some where along the way I lost myself and I lost the road map to the life I had planned with Tad and our children So much grief and sadness in the last 7 and half years, yet somehow some of the happiest days of my life happened in those few years since the last blog post I wrote here on August 15, 2015.
I started this blog so many years ago... I wanted to remember the recipes that created the memories of our life... our life that has now become known as #SurvivingtheStuarts. Recipes of love, laughter, and dang good food! The ingredients of my children's lives that they could one day read through these posts and smile remembering the time when... The things tradition would be made of and all things comforting to look back to on a rainy day, especially when they needed Momma's tomato soup cake or homemade Mac and cheese.
I want to say that life happens and I got busy and just never got back to this space to put words and pictures to the recipes but really, there is no reason I haven't updated this blog. At one point I started a second blog that I vowed would be a better version of this one and while it contained the things I needed it to contain, it never quite felt like home as much as this space feels to me. Maybe because that second blog focused a lot on the days when my mental health was lacking sunshine and grace and this space is all the things I loved in my life. Whatever the reasons, I am sad that I have lost seven and half years of all the things I would have loved to share. Facebook and Instagram are absolutely great at keeping memories alive... if you can get to them through all the advertisements, political garbage, and time stealing reels, but they are mere synopsis of the chapters of my life. Captions without context. Then again, maybe that is what life needed to be for me for the last seven years... captions without context or background, because some things you can't put words to, or maybe I just wasn't ready to.
Seven and half years... Tad and I are still married. Our kids all grew up... well, legally became adults anyway! We have grandkids... sometimes that concept still seems so surreal to me, but here we are living life as Nana and Papa! We built a house, a journey that was filled with so much hope, sadness, faith, and huge miracles along the way. And the adventures... SO MANY adventures. There is a lot of stories in these seven and half years. In my heart I know it is time to share the stories, maybe not in chronological order but on a timeline my heart feels ready to let the words of each story shine in the sun and live forever here in this space.
I am not sure what made me read through this blog today. Maybe because I know big changes are coming soon for us or maybe because I have talked to an old friend a few times in the last two weeks and I was reminiscent on the simpler days of life. Whatever the reason, I am thankful I did... I miss the days in our 690 East house probably more that I will ever miss anything in my life but I also know in my heart that it is time for me to truly start living my life somewhere in the sun.
